Lose or Gain Theory

Every loss has a potential to become a gain given the right attitude and patience. So it is up to you to decide whether it be a loss or gain for you.

Few steps towards turning loss into a gain:

1. Hardship is like a long dark tunnel, the only way out is to go through it.

2. Release your emotions, then learn to control it. Be rational, but not cold blooded - care about others who truly care about you (your family and friends!)

3. Have the courage to face reality, admit there are things in life you have to face, they are there for you to accommodate and learn from, readjust your objectives if necessary, but never give up your faith and moral.

4. Channel your grief into motivation for learning.
Knowledge is the best investment you will make regardless of your age, social status, in any given difficult situations. The more you learn, the broader the perspectives you will gain, and the more chance you will overcome adversity. Being a smart thinker is about being flexible, knowing there are many options for you to choose allows you to make the one that is most advantageous to you in the long term. This is why the more diverse of knowledge you gain, the more opportunities you will discover lying ahead of you than ever before. For instance, who said you can’t combine architecture with business management, entrepreneurship, sociology, religion, neuroeconomy, investing, etc. Innovation comes from recombining across disciplines. Don’t be selfish thinking that only architects/designers can solve architecture/design issues, and that architecture can solve all issues beyond architecture. We need more from others than they need us; we need them to help us break through our boundaries.

5. Learn from the past, learn from others who been through this, learn from books, from web, learn something you never learned before, build up your curiosity towards others you never cared about.
Acquire more knowledge will strengthen your ability to cope with adversity. The qualitative and quantitative returns from investing in your knowledge will help build your material and spiritual wealth in the long run.

6. Learn to look ahead of yourself because there is nothing you could change about the past. So think where you could be in 2, 10, 30 years from now, and walk towards it. Time will not stop for you when you are suffering, so flow with it. Don’t waste what you have accomplished before - You have come all the way up to this point, so there is no reasons to believe you can’t make it to the next.

7. Don’t lose your dream because of your grief of loss, or sympathy of others, because you will only lose, not gain.

8. Optimism helps, but don’t think that by sitting there, everything will turn out to be good later. Optimism will only be effective if you act at the same time, meaning - do something! Some/ a lot of effort is required to reverse the table from loss to a gain. Don’t just thinking optimistically, act with optimism and faith.

9. Look into an infant’s eyes, watch them grow, and you will realize how incredibly intelligent their learning abilities accumulate and adapt, and how incredibly stupid and clumsy the way we (the adults) learn. We are all selfish, trying to defend rather than to embrace and adapt...(learn from tai chi)

10. Courage brings hope, hope brings happiness. Everything you do requires courage, courage, together with faith and knowledge - will help you endure adversity by giving you more options to avoid dead ends, while assisting you to make the most beneficial (lower risk) choices that is best for you in the long run.

11. You do realize you have a plenty of time to learn, grow, experience. Life is a long marathon; losing at this moment does not mean you cannot do better in the long run. Look ahead with courage, faith, and knowledge, and someday, you may just become the one and only - the best.



All these points mentioned above came from my experience with adversity that I am currently still fighting, not from Dr. Phil,….except maybe #1

If you need help, reach me at hsiehyp@hotmail.com, I'll do my best.


"Pain is temporary, it may last for seconds, minutes, hours, days, months, or even years, but if you give up, it will last forever." - Lance Armstrong.

Ciao~